Home
_deneuve_'s Friends [entries|friends|calendar]
_deneuve_

[ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ]
[ calendar | livejournal calendar ]

Vintage clothing for sale - cheap! [18 Jul 2008|11:23pm]

sheruinsyou

I will be selling a bunch of vintage clothing next week, mainly 60s stuff. None of my stuff is crap either. Stay tuned! I need to clear out some space in my closet and I'm willing to make deals.

1 comment|post comment

Невезучий Боби Макферин [19 Jul 2008|02:42am]

indy_44
Хотел пойти на концерт Боби Макферина. Самый дешевый билет стоит 30 евро. А нужно два, /не пойду же я один, как Чикатило какой то/. А моя психологическая граница для билетов на джаз - 20 евро. Вот и не повезло мне с Макферином. Но, конечно, Макферину тоже не повезло со мной.
2 comments|post comment

Внезапная потеря смысла [19 Jul 2008|02:18am]

indy_44
Иду как то утром на работу пешком и вдруг - очень сильное чувство потери смысла. Такое сильное и отчетливое, что даже смешно стало. Ничего, думаю, сейчас поищу, найду зацепку и он вернется. Иду себе спокойно, размышляю, хочу зацепиться за что-то и не получается. Ладно, на работу приду, а там продолжу искать /я ведь хитрый/. Еще даже не дошел, как смысл снова появился, так же внезапно, как и исчез. Восстановился смысл. Такое странное ощущение - так похоже на софтуерную ошибку.
Наверное и у вас случалось такое, а может быть и нет /еще/.
3 comments|post comment

Connect. Share. Enjoy. [18 Jul 2008|06:46pm]

presageant_kiss
[ mood | pessimistic ]
[ music | William Balde - Rayon De Soleil ]

My dream bags. Both YSL. One day, I will have enough money to buy them. But they won't be available to buy because this won't happen in the near future. Or I must find a business man soon.




post comment

'I had cherry red nail polish, too - when I was at your age' [18 Jul 2008|06:00pm]

presageant_kiss
[ mood | crazy ]
[ music | Chingon - Malaguena Salerosa ]

I found the best perfume in the world, really. When we were at the airport in Paris Mom wanted to buy a souvenir but she didn't want something which will lay on a shelf in the next 10 years so she bought a package includes six kinds of little (7.5 ml) Dior perfumes. I hadn't smelled them since then but now I did and searched for it's name and this is it, just for me the taste the smell is incredible and and there's a box on the top. I LOVE IT I LOVE IT I LOVE IT.
Oh, it's name is Miss Dior Chérie by CD (how funny. I love you Fanni, I feel like being in the Gilmore Girls right now.)




I must order or buy it, my Versace is almost gone and I WANT IT NOW. I realized I love all of my perfumes. I keep every single glasses and when I smell them they remind me a certain part of my life, a certain atmosphere. My Valentino Rock and Rose reminds me of Christmas and Kenzo Flowers makes me feel like being at my last Akosh concert etc. They're like CDs were a couple of years ago.

I am a coffee addict! Mom made me realize this. I enjoy so much being in the surgery, I almost know everyone who had already known me. Weird.
I hate when I don't have a daily routine that I had gotten used to I hate being disorganized.
I'm going to learn. I LOVE HISTORY. We have already reached the First World War during the school year and I hate when something is unfinished (that's why I don't like TV shows. I am not allowed to know the end) so I'm reading my History book. And I forgot everything I had learnt during the year so I'm refreshing that.

3 comments|post comment

Why being tired is bad: [18 Jul 2008|06:43am]

violetsnvalium
So after work I threw everyone out around 2.30am because it was very annoying, and then I cleaned up, and then I thought, "Hey! I will do something useful and paint the graffiti away from the ceiling in the toilets!" Which was a stupid thought, because it was 4am, and I was tired and still fainting, and in a bad mood. But anyway. So I went and got the paint and the brush and stuck masking tape all over the place, and started painting in a dreamy kind of way, and everything was going fine, and then I dropped the paint all over the place and just looked at it in dismay for a bit. Then went and cleaned it up, and after managing to wipe most of it off the floor, started painting some more. Then I dropped the paint again. Seriously. It was like a bad comedy. The ceiling got painted in the end, and the floor is funny-looking but hopefully nobody will look too hard, and I am covered in paint everywhere and I stick to everything and make off-white fingerprints.

And damn, I still have to do the second coat.

Screw it, someone else can do that, I am too stupid to paint seeing as I DROP IT ALL THE TIME. What the hell is wrong with me? I have paint all over my knees and all over the world. I hate paint, it spreads too much. You get a little splodge somewhere and five minutes later you have made little splodges all over the place, and you make a million more while cleaning up the first ones.

I'm so tired I could die. Or just go bomp again. I should probably do something about that.
2 comments|post comment

Unter den Linden [17 Jul 2008|10:26pm]

taramascara
Den bästa tiden, är tiden när lindarna blommar. Om jag skulle ha ett träd, skulle jag vilja ha en lind. Den skulle jag sitta under. Och det skulle dofta lindblom jämt.


Med madeleinekakor, under linden.

I morgon är det sista arbetsdagen för veckan! Sedan är det helg! Förhoppningsvis blir jag klar med 3-4:ans journaler i morgon. Jag är rysligt snabb på att sortera ut gamla journaler! Nästa vecka blir det 1-2:ans. (Det är en tävling som bara jag vet om.)
post comment

Emails from my Mom [17 Jul 2008|10:50am]

way2in2tv
[ mood | amused ]

I know the rest of the family finds my Mom's little notes and emails annoying, but I think they're fantastic. She writes like she talks, and when she writes OR talks, I find it hilarious. I feel like reposting a few of her messages to me, if just to remind me of how cute she is. The trip she's referring to is our upcoming vacation to Paris/London/Kylie. My mom also works part-time as a private math tutor, and she's really really proud of her students and her new business.

---------

7/17/08
10:21AM
Please eat lots of fruit and make sure the vitamin C are up. Get enough sleep We do not want to get sick before the trip.

7/6/08 [when I was sick]
8:06PM
Rice soup:

1/4 cup of rice  and 0.75  water level for medium thick portridge.


6/30/08
2:42PM
For the tooth, if the wisdom is growing and the dentist suggests to remove; we schedule winter break. I took off mine and since it's hurt, winter is better to reduce chances of infection.
Just come home when you are free. Do you have house key? We need your help to plan the trip.
 
Love-miss
Mom

5/28/08
12:30PM
Hi Jamie,
Miss you. Love.
Talk to you later.
Mom

5/21/08
12:07PM
Hi both,

Last Sat I volunteered in library. I moved the clock because it blocked the blackboard. It dropped to my toe. It hurt but I hold back the scream because there were students behind me. A swollen 2nd toe for 2 days and a little black on the big toe now.

This Monday morning, I curled my hair with a curling iron. I unplugged it and left it on the chair. Then I forgot about it and sat on it. 5 inches burnt; some skin peeled off. Now I can't sit and need to see doctor today mainly to get a note so I will work from home the rest of the week.

One student will relocate to Texas and 2 will graduate. But 2 new students are inquiring. Ms de Julia referred me to her cousin's daughter for tutoring. This student will start mid June. It's an honor to get referral from one of the best teacher in CVHS. Also, a student in the library inquired me about SAT tutoring.

Love,

Mom.

4/26/08
9:09PM
Hi, our trip is booked.  Please keep quiet and keep up with our daily routine now.  It will come fast.

Mom.

4/1/08
11:03AM

Hi Jamie,

Hope things are fine with you. The alternations of pants will finish this Friday. We can bring things to you Friday night. Just give us a list. I know, Bed,  Oral B toothbrush.

I called T Rowe Rice for your IRA account and learn Stipend money is taxable.  At the end of 2008, you will get a 1099 form for thtis stipend income.

Therefore it's worth to open the Roth IRA account for you and the stipend money can fund the IRA account.  Or else,  there may be a 25% tax under your name.

Love and hug

Mom

3 comments|post comment

Архетипы [17 Jul 2008|12:10pm]

indy_44

mtarnovo-muzei
Originally uploaded by indy_44.

Археологический музейчик. Город Малко Търново, юг, гора Странджа, на границе с Турцией.
Виден фалос охраняющий вход. Если его посмотреть с другого ракурса - оказывается статуя какого-то римского вельможи.

1 comment|post comment

Черное море [17 Jul 2008|12:06pm]

indy_44

primorsko-4adari
Originally uploaded by indy_44.

Морской пейзаж с лифчиком. На днях валялся на пляже. Город Приморско.

2 comments|post comment

o lord! o pain! [17 Jul 2008|01:58am]

violetsnvalium
So today, there I was behind the bar, the way I am every day (until the 27th of July, when I get a day off), and then stomach cramps, and then dizzy, and then bomp onto the floor. Great. I fainted behind the bar. How professional. So I went and got water and then came back and threw out George who took over with the beer, and then an hour later, stomach cramps and dizzy all over again, and bomp. Stupid body. I tried to come back again but this time it was George who threw me out. So there you are. I had to go home and leave George working, even though he doesn't work there. George is lovely. My body is so stupid though, what's wrong with it? I feed it and don't stick pins in it or anything, what's the problem? Ridiculous. How am I ever going to take over the world if I just go bomp?

Today I went book shopping. Half for me, half for my lady friend. That way it's fair. I got her T. S. Eliot in French, I looked at it and it isn't as good. How do you translate poetry? That must be hell on wheels. Every word, every weight, every syllable has to be exact; and then you have to actually translate the damn poem as well. I went through it and wrote her little messages in pencil in Four Quartets, and put it in a box that I have to send her soon, because it keeps getting fuller and fuller. Is it strange to send a girl one chess piece? I have a chess set made of glass, one half is smoky and the other half is clear, I'm not sure which represents black and which is white, but it doesn't matter. I love my chess set. I put the smoky queen in the box. I am bad at chess.

The other day, Delilah was looking at what I was doing, which was sending flowers to my lady friend. She said, "Why that bouquet?" I said, Because there's amaryllis. She said, "Why amaryllis?" I said, Because it means beautiful & timid & proud. She said, "What are you putting on the note?" I said, Tu me tues. Tu me fais du bien. She said, "Why can't I date a man who has a woman's brain for sending presents?" I said, Don't know.

It must be terrible being straight, also you don't get to touch boobies. It doesn't matter though because I don't think anyone actually bothers to decode my bouquets and strange metaphors, it is just fun for me. And I think that my lady friend quite likes getting flowers. With all the crap I keep sending her, she is probably sleeping on a heap of petals and stalks and learning how to breathe only pollen. Like a bee. I have turned her into a bee. I am sorry about that. What the hay.

Why isn't there a place online where you can send someone honeysuckle and jazz and a ticket to Cuba?

Oh, and I wonder why I have no money. Hm. Fairly obvious really. I got Saint-Saen's organ symphony on vinyl today, it was three euros, I think this is a spiffing bargain. Sadly my record player lives in another country.

Well anyway, enough of this, I should probably sleep. I'm working tomorrow and wish to avoid any possible bomp.
post comment

The Nature Conservancy [17 Jul 2008|01:01am]

presageant_kiss
[ mood | exhausted ]
[ music | Marvin Gaye - What's Going On ]

Finally. I like you, Natalie Portman.
http://www.vanity.hu/hir/93-cipok-az-allatk-nzas-ellen
I want to see those shoes. I hope the price is not that high. I've ordered so many things since the USD is so weak.

post comment

let's play that you understand what I say [17 Jul 2008|12:08am]

presageant_kiss
[ mood | busy ]
[ music | Ákos - Játsszuk el ]

I judge people so easily. We've had a big discussion about if you have an opinion about something, do you judge, at the same time or they are separate things?
When I have a bad opinion about something/somebody I judge them. I don't have the right of course because I don't know anything about life, I'm so young and inexperienced but I always have opinion about everything and for me it's maybe the easiest thing in my life to tell those opinions.
Do I have the right to have an opinion when it's a judging at the same time?

I helped Dad in the surgery, I've done it before so many times but only for 1-2 hours, now I was there from 2 pm to 6 pm. The nurse's son is having his wedding on Saturday so Dad let her go to prepare and now I'm the nurse.
They brought in a little boy, he's only turning two in October. And he's had four surgeries. He was born with some kind of deformation in his back and they had to operate him but they sucked it and had to fix him and now they let him away from the hospital but the gash got infected so his mother came to dad for advice.
When they came in I started with asking how much narcotics he's gotten and she said he hadn't had anything.
Oh my God I thought I was going to cry the little boy in his mother's arm and he was like a doll. He was exhausted because of the examinations and operations. He couldn't ever lift his hand up.
It's so unfair. Do not misunderstand me Julia is the only person in my life who I am able to kill for. But Agota was anorexic, she was so irresponsible, egoist, unhealthy and careless, when she saw she gained weight she starved herself, she did SO MUCH exercise. She only noticed her pregnancy when she was in her 6 months. Because she pulled her stomach back and was so blind and was afraid of telling anyone about her health problems because she knew everybody was already totally in panic because of her not-eating thing and she didn't want them (us) know about the stomach-ache and feeling sick.. And they didn't want her, they didn't want Julia at all and she's totally healthy after those tortures.
And I AM INCREDIBLE GRATEFUL FOR GOD LETTING US HAVING HER but how is that fair to the other parents and children who are waiting for the kids and try getting pregnant and being careful and they get sick children who suffer because LIFE SUCKS. Life isn't fair.
Maybe I'm terrified because what if my child/ren is going to have some kind of problem and that's why I care about this stuff. It's not true. I know it's not true I don't have to think of myself the worst. I'm too paranoid. Why am I so obsessed with children and maternity? I got too much prolaktin.

post comment

Ыыы! Третья часть! [17 Jul 2008|12:22am]

amsterdam_cat
9 comments|post comment

Murderer Susan Atkins denied compassionate release [15 Jul 2008|10:57pm]

sheruinsyou
[ mood | relieved ]

SACRAMENTO, Calif. (Associated Press) -- A follower of Charles Manson who stabbed pregnant actress Sharon Tate to death nearly 40 years ago but is dying of brain cancer in a California prison was denied compassionate release Tuesday.

The California Board of Parole released its unanimous decision on the release of Susan Atkins hours after a 90-minute hearing, during which it heard impassioned pleas from both sides.

"Obviously, it was too hot of a potato for them to handle," said one of Atkins' attorney, Eric P. Lampel. "Of course we're disappointed. There's no basis for denying this."

Lampel filed a motion July 10 with Los Angeles County Superior Court Judge David Wesley asking for his client's release no matter what the parole board recommended. No hearing has been set, Lampel said after the hearing.

"We're going to be able to make the case in court. We'll take it to the next step," he said after being informed of the board's decision by The Associated Press.

Atkins' doctors and officials at the women's prison in Corona made the request in March because of her deteriorating health. She also has had her left leg amputated and is paralyzed on her right side, her husband, James Whitehouse, told the California Board of Parole Hearings.

Whitehouse, also acting as one of Atkins' attorneys, had argued that his wife was so debilitated that she could not even sit up in bed. He told the parole board there was no longer a reason to keep her incarcerated.

He said doctors have given her three months to live. Atkins, in a hospital near the Southern California prison where she was housed for nearly 40 years, did not attend Tuesday's hearing.

The request for compassionate leave generated opposition from relatives of the victims, the state corrections department, Los Angeles County prosecutors and Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger.

"Those kinds of crimes are just so unbelievable that I am not for compassionate release in that case," Schwarzenegger said Tuesday before the parole board issued its decision.

Atkins, Manson and two other cult members, Patricia Krenwinkel and Leslie Van Houten, were tried for the 1969 cult killings of Tate; Leno and Rosemary La Bianca; and four others. Tate, the wife of filmmaker Roman Polanski, was 8 1/2 months pregnant.

Sharon Tate's sister, Debra Tate, the last surviving member of her immediate family, sent a letter to the board opposing Atkins' release.

"She is a cold-blooded woman who to this day has not displayed any remorse," wrote Tate, who lives in the Los Angeles area.

The defendants maintained their innocence throughout the trial. Once convicted, the women confessed to the killings during the penalty phase.

On the stand, Atkins recounted her role in stabbing Tate, who pleaded for the life of her unborn baby. Atkins claimed she was on LSD at the time but did not apologize for the crime until a parole hearing years later.

Her brother, Steve Atkins, told the parole board Tuesday that he and his sister had been abused as children.

"After Susan got in with Manson, she was lost to me," he said. "Please let us be with Susan in private in her last days, to pray with her and give our last good-byes."

The defendants were sentenced to death, but their terms were commuted to life sentences when the U.S. Supreme Court temporarily ruled the death penalty unconstitutional. Manson and the two other women remain in state prison.

Atkins has spent 37 years in the California Institution for Women, where she has been held longer than any other female inmate in state history. She was transferred to the hospital in March.

Los Angeles County District Attorney Steve Cooley said that's where she ought to remain. In a letter to the parole board, Cooley said the nature of Atkins' crimes alone should rule out any release.

He noted that after Atkins stabbed Tate, she tasted her blood and used it to write the word "Pig" on the victim's door.

Los Angeles County prosecutor Patrick Sequeira said the board made the right decision because of the crime Atkins committed. He said he informed Debra Tate and two other relatives of the victims.

"They are both relieved and pleased with the decision," Sequeira said. "It obviously doesn't take away the pain for them."

He said it's unclear whether a Los Angeles County judge can consider the compassionate release request from Atkins' attorneys without a recommendation from the parole board.

Compassionate releases are rare in California, with just 10 of 60 requests granted last year, Corrections Department spokeswoman Terry Thornton said.

Atkins' medical treatment and paying for prison guards to watch over her has cost state taxpayers more than $1.4 million since March, according to the corrections department.

Atkins, 60, has been denied parole 12 times.

2 comments|post comment

DANCER IN THE DARK [16 Jul 2008|12:49am]

presageant_kiss
[ mood | pessimistic ]
[ music | Vuk filmzene (Hungarian cartoon song) ]

I had just finished watching it. People can't do films like that without giving the chance to talk about the movie and the ask Björk and Lars von Trier what was it like and.. or I don't know. Maybe I couldn't even say anything.
My list of films those I'd never be able to watch once again has grown.
Dead Man Walking
Earthlings (Actually I haven't even seen it, only the first five minutes but I am not able to start it one more time. I should. And I will. Just need to be much more stronger.)
Passion of Christ
- Dancer in the dark -

Am I weak? Or too sensitive? Or too sympathetic?
No, I don't think. I mean, my God who the hell would be able to be not sensitive when it's about finishing your life before it should finish? Or maybe it is just a big deal for me because I'm young and I'm not ready for death at all? But who is the one who says she/he is ready for dying?
Perhaps you have moments when you feel but it's something that you never had experienced before and you cannot prepare because you haven't the faintest idea what's waiting for you after this life.
Maybe this is what religion exists for. People are able to grab something and make themselves believe something good is waiting for them, something better, something else.
Or just simply they believe that THERE IS SOMETHING out there. It's comforting because that's how your current/previous life worked: you finish something then you start something. That's the rule. But not after death and this is what is really scary.

I've always been able to make myself feel like other people, I'm able to make myself angry, sad, happy anytime I want. It's like a hypnosis.
But I can't make myself feel passionate, enthusiastic, being in love or curious. Never, they are something those are just coming and going and I can't control them. They have their time in my life and when they must go they disappear. One day I would like to learn how to have a power on them, but now there are no risks I don't hurt anybody with them (sometimes myself but I need the exprience, I become stronger). When I'll have children I won't be this weak, I'll have control on the most important things.

post comment

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! [15 Jul 2008|11:54pm]

stiletto_freek
[ mood | jubilant ]

And because it is July 16th here already!!!!!!



Happy Birthday  [info]tchitchina !

I wish all the luck, all the fun and all A/R love.
I hope you will have a glorious day!
5 comments|post comment

I'm...back [15 Jul 2008|11:31am]

midnightdew
Now that I have daily internet (8 whole hours at work everyday!) I figured I can start getting active again. So I'm back at Georgetown, overpaying for housing but I had to do it because I couldn't spend the entire summer at my parent's house. Like....I move in and my entire closet is filled with my dad's old soviet university physics textbooks and my sisters extra toys and clothes. I didn't even take my clothes out of my suitcases the entire time. The bed was mostly occupied by the new cat. And I felt too guilty to go explore NYC or do anything most days because I felt like I should be helping around the house or helping to take care of my sister. So I decided it was better to just move to DC.
I have a new job with a firm called Social Technologies. It only pays minimum wage, which barely even covers rent, but hopefully it helps me out later on. I'm mostly doing research on Russian markets and stuff, its not too bad. And all the supervisors are nice, so no big complaints. I also got hired at Annie's Cream Cheese, a pretty well-known designer vintage store around here, I start next weekend.
The rest of the time I spend trying to decide what to do with my life in a year....I can't believe college is almost done! I start studying for the LSAT and got pretty good results, but I'm just not sure about being a lawyer. So I've been doing some other research. The fellowship office at school says that my chances at getting a Fullbright are nil with my current essays, maybe I'll just apply for a teaching assistanship in France. I'm also considering the MSc program in Environment and Development at the London School of Economics. Its only a year, so I won't have THAT much debt, and it might help me get a nice consulting job. I just don't wanna live in the states. I know its the perfect country for most people-all the opportunities, etc. But I hate the food, the work-first mindset, the men, the lack of any aesthetic or fashion sense, lack of interest in anything but making money or being successful. I just don't want a cushiony life in some suburb with 2.5 kids, a bmw, a "perfect" husband who I'll stop having sex with after the first six months, and constantly worrying about food, exercise and gaining weight. I want to see the world, experience new things, go to museums, be surrounded by stylish and sophisticated people, have intelligent conversations, fall in love, eat real food...its  not gonna happen here, I know it.
1 comment|post comment

[14 Jul 2008|09:25pm]

vodkasnowqueen
[ mood | bitchy ]

Today was mostly fine. It started off alright until I answered the phone right before I was supposed to go in to process. It was this woman who was asking if we carried a brand of wart remover. I said I'd go check out on the floor and went and looked in the wart remover section. There wasn't anything that resembled what she was talking about. I even asked Hoa if she knew if we carried it, and she said no. So I got back on the phone and told her we didn't have that in stock. She asked what brands we had, I told her.  She insisted that we carried it and that it came in a tube. I told her I didn't see anything that was in a tube (and I didn't). That of course led to her wanting to talk to someone who 'knew what they were talking about'. I transferred her to HBC (who are the ones in charge of that section anyway). Somehow she got transferred back and Hoa answered and she started bitching about me, my attitude and how unhelpful I was. Apparently she was saying that I didn't even look on the floor and all kinds of other shit that wasn't true. Hoa stuck up for me, but I know the woman on the phone wouldn't have believed it anyway.

Of course when that kind of shit happens it really colors the way the rest of the day goes. I was really nice to everyone because I was sure something else shitty was going to happen. Thankfully it didn't. It tends to be if you get one customer yelling at you, sooner or later you'll get another. I hate retail.

My brother and I have gotten through watching season one of Enterprise. I really want to get to season three because that's when all the cool stuff happens relationship wise, but I don't want to skip ahead for some reason. Damn it!

post comment

disregard the stop board [14 Jul 2008|04:53pm]

presageant_kiss
[ mood | relaxed ]
[ music | U2 - Kite ]

She told me she has somebody who she knows and she works for a hospital as a 'hospital soul-taker-carer' and she works from 8am to 6pm. And I told her yes, this must be hard. And she told me this woman is so unhappy how unfair it is and it is the government's fault.
I told her if she is so unhappy why doesn't she quit? She could get another job because she has a religion teacher degree. And Christina told me how stupid I was, this woman was meant to be there in the hospital, God told her that she has to be there and being around kids and help them. And it doesn't work that way how I think.
BUT COME ON. I've always thought that if Christina and her friends and at the school I used to go the people are HAPPY because they do what God told them to do and they feel good. BUT APPARENTLY THEY DON'T. THEY SUFFER. And they make themselves believe and feel that they were told to do that and then, they expect us to feel sorry for them.
I told this to Christina and that I am not able to feel sorry because they make themselves being miserable. This is what I respect in the Eastern Religions: they are SO HAPPY. THEY FEEL GREAT BEING WITH WHAT THEY BELIEVE IN. And it is a lifestyle which is really worth to envy.
And Christina told me I am socially insensitive because I don't feel sorry for people like this woman (and Christina). But they have the chance to change their lives!
Maybe I am the blunt but I am not able to understand her.
I was grown up in a family which is religious but don't go church every Sunday. But I've always liked the atmosphere around religious people. But now, it's changed. They went far away and it's too much. When I was in the protestant school I liked the people there. But I'M glad I didn't have the feeling of becoming a religion teacher or something like that because it seems that in secondary school the religious stuff is light but if you go to a protestant university you become obsessed. It's like a faction. And actually, it's scary.
After Christina was left by Csabi she fell apart because she has her theory: God sent Csabi to her and they are 'the ones' for each other and Csabi only went to Atlanta because it was task and Christina had to follow him. Well, it turned out it's a little bit wrong.
So now, she told me she feels God expects her being alone in her life, and she will never have children. I told her nobody has the right to ask anything like that. She told me God has every right.
Well, I know that I didn't treat her in the smartest way. Since that weekend at our Lake House I do hurt her where I am able to. And I haven't stopped doing that. But I know her achilles tendon so I hurt her much more than she hurts me. I know that she is VERY WORRIED of the way she looks, her weight her clothes. And she only tell me me things like 'you're like a bitCh dealing a lot with your clothes and hair' because she is jealous but it's easier to blame me.
She's always treated me like someone who is dying for fashion and spend so much money on clothes.
We went shopping last week (she bought a bag, about 20 hair-stuff and five tops. I didn't buy anything, only the next day a top. But it doesn't matter, just wrote down as an interesting stuff) and we saw a vest. And I told her she should buy it because it's her style. But she told me she won't and she didn't want to tell my why. At home she told me: that vest remembered her a top in Devil Wears Prada, Anne Hathaway wore that when she was still at her original style. And Christina told me she didn't want to look like a looser. This tells me so much about her insecureness.
The day before that I made her watch the movie because I know it's not a big creature but I live the acting of Meryl and I love Emily Blunt and the MUSIC IS SO GREAT and Valentino is there.. So I wanted her to see it and she's never heard of Meryl Streep (She hasn't ever heard of Catherine, too) and when I told her that even Mom adores Meryl Streep she accepted to watch this.
But of course I should have show her Out of Africa or another more serious Meryl movie, it wasn't the best choice for her, I admit that.
After the film she told me it was terrible, Meryl Streep is ridiculous and this is a film for me, she shouldn't have to expect anything else if I like something that must be meaningless and having nothing message.
And she asked me why I like it, it shows a bad side of fashion industry. I hate to explain that I do not agree with the wastage and excess. She didn't understand what I was talking about.

post comment

navigation
[ viewing | most recent entries ]
[ go | earlier ]