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Quotes: Novacaine for The Soul.
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| Saturday Survey |
[11 Oct 2008|12:28pm] |
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mood |
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 ditzy |
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Stolen from ![[info]](http://p-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) cazzicles
10 things you wish you could say to ten different people right now:
- Please just open your eyes and see how your actions have caused all of this. Your words and your actions never seem to match.
- Things are going to get better - but the change can only begin with you. You know I'm always here for you.
- Be careful, my darling, and keep your head in these new experiences - you are going to have the time of your life!
- JUST GO FOR IT!
- I love you, I miss you and don't want to lose you - please help me make sure that won't happen.
- I am so proud of you for everything you have achieved and your strength and courage through all you have been through. You are my hero.
- You telling me that you are not sure makes me scared - you've always been a steady point in my life.
- I miss what we had and don't know if it will ever return.
- I don't miss you but I do wonder if you are okay.
- I wish we had taken the chances we were given when we were younger - now it just all seems too late. I will always smile at the memories.
09 things about yourself:
- I used to dream of being a doctor until I realised I hadn't the actual scientific mind that appears to be required for such a task! Thankfully I realised it pretty quickly.
- I have the worst case of restlessness. Whenever I am in the one place for any great length of time, or in the same job, I get restless and want to try something new. As a primary school teacher I at least get a different group of children every year!
- In honestly don't know if I will always work as a teacher......again the restlessness sets in and I would like to pursue other things too.
- I often play the 'glue' roll in friendships and am fiercely loyal to my friends - which sometimes causes more harm than good as I can't see past the loyalty when I should really be angry or frustrated with them.
- I'm a master of 'party happy face' and can cover up my emotions ridiculously well. Often when I've been hurt, very few people will ever know.
- I hate confrontations and will avoid them as much as I can.
- I have never learned to drive yet, as when I attempted it I found I got faaaar too easily distracted and would probably be a danger on the roads!
- I have been playing the flute for 16 years. I also play the saxophone, and the piano and I went through a brief spell of the drums.
- I don't for a second understand the 'global credit crisis' happening right now.
- I find joy in artistic activities and use it as my relaxation - playing music or listening to it, painting, writing, reading.....anything that involves some creativity.
08 ways to win your heart:
- Make me laugh and laugh with me.
- Be honest with me and be someone I can trust.
- Have a passion and believe in something.
- Love your family and friends and demonstrate that love.
- Be accepting of other peoples flaws - especially mine.
- Be genuine.
- Love music and get ridiculously excited over some obscure song that speaks to you!
- Believe in me.
07 things that cross your mind a lot:
- My friends
- How strange a city Prague can be.
- What I'm going to have for dinner.
- "Am I doing the right thing?!"
- Something I forgot about and I need to urgently do!
- How much I want to be back in my bed
- Daydreams about huge hugs when I visit home again!
06 things you do before you fall asleep:
- Brush my teeth.
- Put on my pyjamas
- Switch on a DVD to drift off to sleep to!.
- Set my alarm clock
- Settle the kittens - usually cuddled up on my bed somewhere..
- Get comfortable and hope for a proper sleep right through the night.
05 people who mean a lot:
- My family (as a unit!)
- Kirsty
- Thomas,
- Certain other friends who won't fit into the 5 people category but they know who they are :)
- People I've lost (family members and friends) - they still mean a lot.
04 things you're wearing right now:
- Old baggy jeans
- Purple vest top
- Silver cardie over the top
- Fluffy slippers :)
03 songs that you listen to often (currently):
- Heart Of The Matter by India Arie
- This One's Gonna Bruise - Beth Orton
- Lost - Coldplay
02 things you want to do before you die:
- Marry and have a family of my own.
- Complete my 'list'.
01 confession:
- I'm used to believe in the 'good in people' but as I get older, I find that belief drifting away......it's still there but not as strong and it is very difficult to know how long it will be there.
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| Bittersweet. |
[11 Oct 2008|04:21am] |
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mood |
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I love fall, it's the in between stage of summer and winter. I don't consider it a real season; it only lasts for two months. Especially in the mid west. This fall has been quite the change for me; I'm going through another revelatory period. It started to happen just as the seasons started to change. At first, I felt like I was just going crazy, which is every few months when I get too much into my head.I start over-analyzing ten times more than usual and that's way too much for a brain to handle. Being introverted sometimes is good, but too much time by yourself can disconnect you from the world and isolate you into some sort of numb coma. I've been trying to make myself avoid true depression by going out with friends at least every other day and talking to my mom. I'm afraid of change. And, when it happens I'm energized and ready for it and then the scary part of letting go of how things use to be paralyze me for a moment. I have to pick myself up and force myself back into this world and start again. It happens every time I start a new job, end a relationship with a friend or a lover, move to another place, etc.
It really consumes me at first but then something amazing happens... I adapt.
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| De los cuentos para dormir |
[11 Oct 2008|01:24am] |
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mood |
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 creative |
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A mi nunca me sirvieron los cuentos para dormir (al menos no para dormir). De hecho, recuerdo que nunca me contaban cuentos para dormir más que cuando estaba en casa de mi abuela y mis tías me contaban cuentos o me tocaban la guitarra. Pero no creo que me hubieran hecho dormir, si bien no me hubieran dejado dormir.
Cuando escucho una buena historia, leo un buen libro o una buena película, me estremezco y tengo esa sensación maravillosa que no se poner bien en palabras. Mi cerebro se acelera y ya la veo, ya la veo, una nueva historia, una nueva frase maravillosa. Una nueva cadencia poética.
Quizá es por eso que muchos escritores tienen el hábito de hacerlo a deshoras. No creo que tenga nada que ver con el romanticismo lunar (aunque también podría ser la ausencia del bien amado, eso es muy válido).
Pero...si a ustedes si les sirven y un día requieren de uno, pídanlo. A veces salen cosas buenas, a veces no. Pero mientras a algunos nos sirve de ejercicio creativo, a otros servirá de relajación.
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| A new poll is up and Hatred is being revised |
[10 Oct 2008|10:00pm] |
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mood |
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 contemplative |
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music |
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"Breath" breaking benjamin |
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The poll for If I Could I Would Not Love You is up in my profile now and it will be there until the end of this story. Remember to vote for your favorite choice.
http://www.fanfiction.net/u/643709/deathrosekitty
Hatred, a SasuOC story, is being revised before I add chapter five, so if you want to re-read it or just pick it up now, then I have the first chapter revised.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/2521759/1/Hatred
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| Have You Read Yet? |
[11 Oct 2008|01:05pm] |
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You, quite possibly, have the worst timing in the world.
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| long story short... |
[10 Oct 2008|10:52pm] |
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mood |
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 at peace |
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music |
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the sounds of the city, horns and a sax<3 |
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i got fucked up last night and now i'm at a yoga conference with mom in the city.
ahhhh i love the smell and the sound of it<3 ...sometimes when i get homesick, i hum the mr softee song..;)
anyway, i got a head massage from this lady and [i swear, creepiest thing ever... she was so in tune with me..] afterward she said she just got this feeling, and not to worry, i can do it... whatever i is.
she didn't know what she was talking about.. but holy shit i did.
also, this fucking AWESOME lady who owns a bookstore here was talking to me about gemstones and their meaning and i've been drawn to rose quartz recently..? so she explained.. [more later] and she askes me some Q's about myself [not creepy, jw] and asked what my major was... and she told me the world needed more people like me in the world [for CJ] and afterward she said she'd see me in a few years... like.. i NEVER told her i planned on moving to NY.. never. but i do... and i have no doubt i'll see her again. i thoroughly enjoyed our conversation. she's.awesome. buddhist... and she's a big 'ol black lady. fave.person.ever. ok well since i have to get up at the asscrack of dawn tomorrow.. goodnight! have a good weekend and i'll try to get pics up later in the week.
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[10 Oct 2008|02:27am] |
I just dont want to be that crazy girl any more.
I want to be one of the few who actually get over their daddy issues and get into a healthy relationship.
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| If I fell... |
[10 Oct 2008|01:26am] |
If I fell in love with you,
would you promise to be true
and help me understand
cause I've been in love before
and I found that love was more
tha just holding hands
If I give my heart to you
I must be sure
from the very start
that you
would love me
more than him
If I trust in you
oh now please
don't run and hide
if I love you too
Please don't hurt
my pride like him
cause I couldn't stand
the pain
and I would be sad
if our new love was in vain
So I hope you see
that I would love
to love you
Cause I wouldn't stand the pain
and I would be sad if our new love
was in vain
If I fell in love with you...
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| wow |
[09 Oct 2008|07:43pm] |
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mood |
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 melancholy |
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music |
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Girls Around the World :: Lloyd |
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#1.this...
Find out more about Armani on peta.org.
made me cry.
i don't cry often.[[i love GillAn]]
#2. i'm going out tonight, only to be dragged back to the dorm at 8am and then only to leave again to go meet my mom at newark,
i'm going to dieeeeeeee. we're playing beer pong at franks... tthese boys don't know whats gonna hit 'em ;)
#3. yoga conference in the city this weekend!!!!
wooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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| Wtfwtfwtf. |
[09 Oct 2008|05:43pm] |
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I wish I could just waste my time writing about bitchy friends and stress and friends that have become bitchy because of stress, but as the past few weeks have taught me, there's no wasting time anymore. Minutes easily become hours and hours, days and we lose every second. Doing what? Writing palancas, finishing homework, making proposals? Planning a soiree, getting ready for a party? What is the point of it? What is the point of anything anymore? Sometimes I wonder what useless means, what it is. I lost that concept once I became it.
Frustration, confusion, amusement. All these feelings just mesh together when life is going by this fast. Everything feels so surreal, like everything is literally just speeding by and I'm not moving at all. I'm doing things just for the sake of doing them, for the sake of reaching the dream that I've already lost sight of. I've lost sight of a lot of things, and time can only tell if I can ever find them again.
What the hell is compelling me to be such an involved little fucker? Why can't I go back to the sidelines? I'm beginning to think I just fit in more there.
I don't know exactly what I'm trying to say or what I'm asking out of this. I just want to let all this out because I need to. I want to be me again, whoever the hell that was. I want the passion of doing things again, because I don't fcking have that anymore. I want the freedom to complain, or enjoy. I want whatever I had back.
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| Obsolete |
[09 Oct 2008|12:51am] |
This has become nothing more than an archive.
See biggerthnthesky
An newer but deeper existence as this once no longer matches myself and my goals.
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| Y por qué nos gustan tanto las esquinas? |
[09 Oct 2008|01:10am] |
Estaba pensando en imágenes poeticas con, sobre y acerca de las esquinas. Por qué son tan mágicas las esquinas.
En mi caso, tiene mucho que ver con ciertos recuerdos que... bueno, fueron los principales impulsores de mi carrera poética. Las esquinas serán siempre especiales para mí.
Supongo que tiene que ver con el hecho de que si uno se pone en el lugar correcto, es sólo visible para la mitad del mundo.
Qué tienen de romántico y prohibido las esquinas?
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| Cuando se escribe 5 minutos sin pausa |
[09 Oct 2008|12:17am] |
Qué pasa cuando nadie está viendo? Crece la soledad? Se percibe solo el género humano? Nada?
Es que siempre hay alguien viendo, alguien dando.
Los que creemos que nos han olvidado nos vigilan y a veces vigilamos a los que nos olvidan.
Es un secreto, pero en el pasar de las multitudes no nos detenemos a mirar. Quizá es ahí cuando en verdad estamos solos. Quizás nos volvemos invisbles hasta que seamos diferentes.
Si me vuelvo diferebre dejo de ser tan transparente?
Si deseo que me escuchen debo pararme sobre la punta del pie derecho y cantar en fa sostenido? Llegar a la nota más alta que conozco?
Y si no camino en, entre o por multitudes?
Si yo soy una multitud, hoy soy yo; pero ya no soy mañana y quizás seré el lunes
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| What can you do? |
[08 Oct 2008|10:01pm] |
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mood |
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 blank |
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I try so hard to hide things that happened to me as a kid...but sometimes I just want to scream all my demons out to the world..just to get it over with...I feel like no one will ever be able to be close to me or understand me the way they should be able to without this happening... I feel like I miss out on alot of things because Im scared. I always wondered when the breaking point would be when all of this would just disappear into thin air. When I was a kid, I just thought things like this would go away never to be thought about again...maybe soon...Everything I do in life, just has to feel right..and there is a small percent left in me that believes I will get better. I just hope in years to come, that percent increases alittle...till one day I will just look back and say...it happened...your fine...your happy!
Til then..I think Im just going to be by myself..enjoy the company of my friends...and get really really high.
Ughhhh......help : /
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[08 Oct 2008|09:24pm] |
Si cuelgo entre un sí y un no...
si me cuelgas tú,
y me falta aire, pierdo el piso y mi más preciado norte,
entonces, te decides?
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[07 Oct 2008|07:49pm] |
As high as the moon
So high were my spirits
When you sang out my name
And coming from you
It was enough just to hear it
Oh, it rang like the bells did today
But even the sturdiest ground
Can shift and can tremble and let us fall down…
Kindly unspoken
You show your emotion
And silence speaks louder than words
It’s lucky I’m clever
Cause if I didn’t know better
I’d believe only that which I’d heard
In the days of my folly
I followed your lead
Did what Simon Says to do
But I won’t let melancholy
Play me for a fool
Oh, no I’m on my way somewhere new
And as far as your lack of something to say
Well, to tell me goodbye there was no better way
Kindly unspoken
You show your emotion
And silence speaks louder than words
It’s lucky I’m clever
If I didn’t know better
I’d believe only that which I’d heard
So don’t keep me up till the dawn
With words that’ll keep leading me on
I know much better than to wait for an answer from you
Kindly unspoken
You show your emotion
And silence speaks louder than words
It’s lucky I’m clever
If I didn’t know better
I’d believe only that which I’d heard
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| stole |
[07 Oct 2008|07:32pm] |
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mood |
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chipper |
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music |
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On & On :: Missy Elliot |
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01. Name a fandom and I'll tell you:
1. The first character I fell in love with:
2. The character I never expected to love as much as I do now:
3. The character everyone else loves that I don’t:
4. The character I love that everyone else hates:
5. The character I would shag anytime:
6. The character I'd want to be like:
7. The character I'd slap:
8. A pairing that I love:
9. A pairing that I despise:
10. Favorite character:
11. What are your five favorite things about your fandom?
12. What are your five least favorite things about your fandom?
13. Who are your five favorite characters?
14. Who are your five least favorite characters?
15. What are your five favorite pairings?
16. What are your five least favorite pairings?
17. Which character are you most like?
18. What is your deep, dark fandom secret?
02. BOFF, MARRY, KILL:
All you have to do is give me three (3) guys or girls (like celebrities / characters) and I have to choose. Then I'll give you three choices and so on. Please make sure you choose characters / celebrities I know or at least heard of.
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| Tool of My Trade |
[07 Oct 2008|11:28am] |
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