Needless to say, life has been very tricky lately. There is no sense or purpose I can find in anything happening recently. It’s easily been the most difficult time of my life. Many things have been falling to pieces around me. Loosing our marriage, loosing the house, loosing the Malvern sweat lodge and so many of my friend’s lives within unforeseeable problems. I really wish I could make this time better in some way. Like tuning the universal radio knob for better reception.
What I can say is that if it wasn’t for understanding, kind people, I probably wouldn’t be writing this right now. I thank my friends, my Mother, my Boss, and my cats for being there for me. And especially Ian, who was brave enough to call the police the other night to make sure a crisis didn’t happen.
My neighbor, who moved here recently from Ohio with is wife, has also been a rock in supporting me through this. He did what my Father, or my Grandfather, would have done in this situation. He put me to work helping him build a chain-link fence around his backyard for his dog. And also fed me dinner after work :d Yum.
Support comes from the most unlikely of places sometimes. I am thankful for that.
I also learned a new word recently from my neighbor. Persnickety. I suppose growing up in North Philly has shielded me from such creative uses of the English language. I’m sure I have more melting-pot soul in my language than most folk. This just adds to the pot in a great way.
I miss Elizabeth greatly at this point. I truly wish I could make it all better instantly. I am willing to do the work to make it right again. I have always been and always will be.
I find it amusing that life has recently been a lot like Savage Steve Holland’s “Better Off Dead” staring John Cusack. Where the songs playing around me have been, well, deep and dramatic in an 80s sort of way. Recently I have heard the following being played, at random, in the different usual places:
Styx: Babe
Mr. Mister: Broken Wings
Michael McDonald and Patti Labelle: Own My Own
Normally, if there is such a thing, such random places would be playing annoying pop music. Like I said before, I need to find that knob to adjust the station of the universe.
Originally published at Bevilacqua.us. Please comment here. | 
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