The answer to that, ladies and gentlemen, is blowing in the wind..

The cover: We have Jess and Liz, distinguishable as always by their hair and clothing, seated at a table. I always liked this book because it was purple, and I like purple, though not in a sad-Unicorn type way. They are peering into (and Jessica is groping) a crystal ball, with a collection of friends (I think it's Maria, Lila and Randy) gathered around looking amazed, at what I'm not entirely sure. This scene doesn't happen in the book, sadly. Lila is wearing what appears to be grandmother's curtains.

Tale of two minds: Jessica and Elizabeth are watching some movie marathon featuring none other than Jonny Buck. who, as we all know, is Jessica's favourite rock singer OF ALL TIME, and is now Elizabeth's too, apparently. They try to stay up really late (past eleven) to watch the film in the den, but neither of them can, and they both fall asleep. Mr Wakefield comes down and watches a little bit of the film, cos films starring wannabe rock singers really thrill him :-s, but then quietly turns the TV off and goes to bed.

The next morning, Steven is waiting impatiently to go into the den. His dad has told him not to wake the girls up, as they had such a late night (if you count before eleven late, but I suppose they are only twelve). He can't even go into the kitchen (to get food most likely) as his mom is on the phone. Steven is not happy. He sneaks in and accidentally-on-purpose knocks a newspaper onto the floor, to try to wake them, but to no avail. Jessica cracks open one eye then turns over to sleep again. Steven sighs. His mom shows no sign of getting off the phone anytime soon: she is organising a black tie conference at the Regent Hotel for three hundred and seventeen people on the 15th of the month, or the 18th, and the receptionist can't decide on a date. Damn hotels! Steven looks back at the twins and grins (which sounds pretty darn creepy to me, but ok), thinking his sisters look even more alike when they're asleep. Cue our twins stock description. Steven goes back out and bumps into Ned, who tells him he watched a bit of the film, which featured Jonny Buck as a French hero in the Revolution. Trouble is, the Corny-Os jingle, who sponsored the film, was on every ten minutes with the adverts, so that's why Ned didn't watch it all. Not because he doesn't like watching films meant for teenagers fun or anything. Honest!

The twins wake up and go -sleepily- (how much sleep do they need, Christ) to have breakfast. Liz pours them two bowls of Corny-Os  cereal. I wanna try Corny-Os, they seem to feature heavily in these books. Jessica comments it's weird; she woke up thinking about Corny-Os that morning, too. Oohhh, ~cue scary music~. Jessica kids that they might be psychic, but Lizzie laughs, skeptically, as usual. She has a point. Surely if they were psychic, they would have known this long ago.

The next day, Monday, at school, everyone is talking about the movie marathon, but apparently nobody managed to stay up long enough to watch it. Bless, they must all be gutted about missing watching a rock star bumble his way through a late night movie. Besides, haven't they heard of VCRs!! Amy and Liz are discussing school work, as usual (yawn) and Amy asks what topic they are choosing to do for their history paper. Both twins say, in unison, The French Revolution. Ho hum, weird!! Jessica tells Amy about the cereal incident, but Liz just laughs it off.

We cut to a Sixers meeting. Liz is discussing who will cover what at the Middle School Talent Content, which is being held as yet another fundraiser for the local hospital. The hospital must feel blessed to have the likes of LIZ WAKEFIELD helping them. She organises various people to various jobs, and makes a list of who is doing what. Amy is baton twirling. Wow, people will be impressed!

The Unicorns at lunch are where else but the Unicorner. Lolz, still makes me laugh, even now. Bruce and his cronies are there too, and Liz and Amy come over and ask to sit with them, as the lunchroom is full. You know, in some books the Unicorns have real animosity towards Liz and Co. so I'm surprised they allow them to sit there but anyway. The talent contest is being discussed, and Ellen boasts she has the star spot, as she is doing a number. The fact her mom is on the committee has absolutely nothing to do with it you understand! Unbeknown to Ellen, Janet has been ordering everyone else in the Unicorns to do an extra good job, as Ellen's singing is so awful. I'm surprised she let Ellen enter at all. Mandy and Belinda are doing a lip synching act to a Melody Powers song. Someone else is doing a puppet act. Amy suggests Liz and Jessica enter, as they are so obviously psychic as they thought about the same cereal and the French Revolution, and of course everyone wants to know what she is going on about. Jessica tells everyone that her and Liz might (but probably aren't) psychic, against Liz's feeble protests (she loves the attention really. I'm sure Liz is secretly an attention craver)! Bruce of course demands a display, as he as big a skeptic as I am. Lizzie is nervous, but she thinks at least when it doesn't work everyone will stop pestering them. Jess is her usual brash self, and agrees.

Janet tells Elizabeth to think of a number between one and four hundred, and write it down. Jessica has to then guess the number. Everyone is expecting them to fail, but when Jessica says the number 317, and Janet turns the paper over to see 317 there, everyone is spooked. He says they faked it somehow, and demands they do it again. So they do, but with Jessica thinking and Liz guessing, and Jess guesses the number 18 correctly. Bruce still demands one last test, and, to change it a bit, he says it has to be an item of clothing, and a colour. Ooohhh, this could be a little more difficult, as there are way more items of clothing than numbers in between one and four hundred, Bruce! By this time, a small crowd has gathered (much to Liz's disgust I might add) and are watching. This time, Janet thinks of the two items, and Jess has to think of a colour, and Liz the clothing. Jessica guesses Black, and Liz says its a tie. Lo and behold, they are correct. Liz is shocked, as she can't rationally explain it, but Jessica, who is obviously loving the attention, starts boasting that they are psychic.

Randy Mason tells them his uncle is a documentary film maker and would be interested in filming them. Jessica is of course ECSTATIC, whereas Liz isn't.

All day long, the twins are asked questions and followed around. Liz hates the attention (yeah right) and brushes it off, but Jessica loves it and even goes as far as to read Denny Jacobson's head bumps. She tells him to be careful and look both ways before crossing the road. Fair enough I guess. As they walk home, Liz says she doesn't want to be involved anymore, as it is creepy, but Jess overrules her (as usual) and says its only harmless fun.

At home that evening, Jessica gets a call from Janet. Rumours of the twins' psychic abilities have reached the ears of her mother, who is on the committee for the talent contest, and they now want Jessica and Elizabeth to be the main stars with their psychic act. Cough cough in disbelief from this humble reader, but carrying on. Jessica is like, "wheeeee of course we'll do it!". Then she remembers Elizabeth. Not really Lizzie's type of thing is it. Jessica tries to persuade Liz to take part, and at first she says no because she is a complete partypooper but Jess wins her round, as she always does, by telling her about all the money they will be raising for the hospital. We all know Liz is a sucker for raising money for good causes, so she eventually agrees, being the doormat that she is.

At dinner, the twins' tell their parents they will be starring in the show. They are all like, "go for it girls" (just fuck off and let us have a night to ourselves in peace). Liz goes up to her room after dinner to do her homework, when her mom comes in and asks her to deliver a letter and cheque to the Regent Hotel to book the conference room. It must be delivered by Friday or they will lose the room. She butters Liz up by telling her she is the responsible one in the family, and Liz puts it in her backpack so she won't forget. Alice is off on a conference until Friday afternoon, so she won't be able to deliver it herself, although she will be back for the talent show, because those Wakefield parents are just so dedicated and caring!

The next day at school (Tuesday), Ellen is very not impressed about being knocked off the top spot. Jessica couldn't care less; she has the Unicorn's full support and Denny Jacobson tells her she saved his life as he was crossing a one way street but looked both ways for a change and their was a car going the wrong way down the street. Yay, go Jessica and your common sense! Her day is made complete when Randy tells her his uncle will be coming to town soon, and she spins Randy some story about how her and Liz have always been psychic; when they were five Liz got locked in the basement when it was flooding, and Jessica knew she was in there and saved her from drowning. Randy is suitably impressed, and says his uncle will more than likely want to film them in action at the talent show. He tells Jessica his uncle's documentary is also about phony psychics, who ruin it for authentic ones, but Jess feels confident because, after what happened at lunch the previous day, there is no question that her and Liz are psychic.

Liz corners Jessica on her own during the day and asks why on earth Randy thinks Jessica saved her life when they were five. It turns out Jessica conveniently forgot to mention she was the one who locked Liz in the basement, and the water was only a few centimetres deep. Wait, why was Jessica locking Liz in the basement at age five? Dangerous even at such a tender age it seems! Jessica worms out of it, and Liz leaves the subject alone, as per sodding usual. Liz, you are such a drip!

The afternoon after school, Liz is getting a snack when Jessica rushes in. Jess is determined to practice, practice, practice for the talent show, as they haven't had a psychic thought all day. She sets up a broom, a yard stick and a mop into some crude teepee style frame, and makes Liz sit under it with her to 'concentrate'. Errrr, OK then Jessica. Liz is surprisingly enthusiastic, as I guess she doesn't want them to fail at the show either, and tries her hardest to send Jess a message that her hair is sticking out, as, 'Jessica was always very concerned about her appearance. She'd want to know her hair was sticking out'. Sounds like Jessica. Just as Liz is giving up hope, 'Jessica reached up and smoothed her hair'. Because that isn't a normal thing to do at all. I must be tuned in to Elizabeth because I do it all the time. Liz gets all excited and they keep trying to no avail. Jessica is trying to think of an animal and message it over to Elizabeth. However, Jessica is thinking of a peony, which is a type of flower, so Liz gets a bit frustrated. They end up bickering and leaving it. This doesn't stop Jessica from choosing them both costumes for the contest: towels as turbans and gauzy gowns from their dressing up box as dresses. Ahem, very cliqued.

Alice has gone on her trip at the point, and Ned is left caring for the three kids. Lucky him. He mentions to Elizabeth that he watched the Jonny Buck film, and the amount of Corny Os adverts involved. He mentions that Alice is relying on Liz to deliver that letter, and she is like, "Oh shit, I've forgotten!" Oh Noes Lizzie!! She determines to ring the hotel the next day to explain why the cheque isn't there yet. Good old Liz!!

That night in bed, Liz has a nightmare that all the people in Mrs Wakefield's conference are standing at the hotel. The room hasn't been booked and there is no food. Everyone is wearing black ties. Mrs Wakefield comes up to Liz and says, "I trusted you to deliver that letter. Now three hundred and seventeen people have arrived for nothing. I had all that hassle booking a date of either the 15th or the 18th". Liz wakes up with a jump and realises something horrible...................the 'psychic' moments her and Jessica have been having are just coincidences. Their subconscious minds must have remembered everything they heard on the Sunday morning they were sleeping in the den, from the Corny-Os jingle to Mrs Wakefield's convention booking conversation. Right about here is where I started laughing at this book. Typical Sweet Valley!

Elizabeth goes and jumps on Jessica's bed to wake her up and tell her. Jessica isn't best pleased, especially as it's the middle of the night. No, I wouldn't be best pleased either. Liz explains, and Jess realises she is telling the truth. Shame really, it would have been cool if they had really been psychic. Liz panics about what they will do about the talent show, but Jess, who is determined to have her moment in the spotlight, says she will think of something.

The next day (Wednesday), Liz rings up the hotel to explain about the cheque. The manager, Mr Peters, says it's fine, but he needs the cheque by Friday so can she drop it off please. However, he isn't in town until Friday, and the hotel is being renovated so no-one else will be there. She agrees to drop it off on Friday, as long as she can be back at school for seven for the damned talent show.

At school, the twins are still being treated like celebrities, apart from by Ellen, who is jealous and calls them fakes. Randy appears and tells them some more about his uncle, and why fake psychics are wrong. Liz feels all worried, but Jessica just keeps telling everyone they aren't fakes, and all will be proven at the talent show. To make things worse, Sarah Thomas has been chosen by the committee to make the posters, and Liz and Jessica, 'Psychic Sisters', posters are splashed across the school, (Jess isn't happy because she has Ellen Riteman's nose, as Sarah was doing Ellen ones beforehand and had to change it last minute). Jessica's brain will be working overtime I feel to sort this one out.

Jessica decides to talk to Maria, who used to be a child actress, but retired so she could have a normal kids life (In Sweet Valley? Are you joking. What with evil Carnival Ghosts, embittered cheerleaders, ancient Native American ghosts and English classes featuring slime, someone tell me what's normal about it). Jess tells Maria the truth, and begs for help putting on an act to convince everyone at the talent show they aren't fakes. Maria, not being a spiteful person, agrees, and teaches Jessica how to pretend-cry (a skill I thought she'd have learnt at birth) so Liz will agree. I thought Maria was Liz's friend, not Jessica's. O-K then.

Jess and Maria meet Liz in a room after school to tell her the plan. At first Liz refuses, as we all knew she would, and then Jessica 'cries'. Liz, being a total fool, falls for it hook line and sinker, and agrees to fake their act to fool the audience. As we all knew she would. Tut tut, dishonesty, Elizabeth! As soon as she agrees, Jess looks up with no sign of tears. Grr, I'd walk out then, but not our Liz. Maria instead goes with them to Caseys, as apparently she thinks ice cream is good for stage fright (yeah, and she's hungry after listening to Elizabeth's whining).

That night, Liz has a change of heart and decides not to go ahead with the show. She isn't convinced they can pull it off, and besides, its dishonest. She tells Jessica, and they have a massive row about it. Liz won't budge (go Liz), and they go to bed angry.

Both twins' have nightmares. Jessica dreams everyone is watching them on-stage and they can't do anything. Everyone starts chanting, "fakers, fakers", and Ellen gets up and denounces them publicly. Liz dreams nearly the same thing, except her family are all saying how disappointed they are in her. Bless. She wakes up and goes and jumps on Jessica's bed, again. Jess is even less pleased than before, and I don't blame her. She cheers up, however, when Liz decides she will do the show after all, using Maria's cheating method. Go Lizzie, you break those rules!!!

On Thursday, the twins learn Randy's uncle will be filming the contest after all. Liz nearly has a coronary, but Jessica rallies her round, as usual, and they meet up with Maria after school to practice. Maria was once in a movie about a fake psychic, and still has the props she used. There is a sheet she has where every consonant in the alphabet corresponds with a facial movement. They need to learn this before the next day. Yeah, right. That way, one twin can 'spell' out a word, and the other can guess it by mentally filling in  the vowels. O-K then! They ask Maria to be in their act by being the person who asks the twins questions, i.e. think of an animal, and write it down, etc etc.  Surely she could help them cheat a lot easier than this, being in this position, but obviously they don't think of that.

All evening the twins practice. At dinner, Ned asks Jess if she is OK, as her face is twitching. She is of course practicing. Lolz. This is probably the first time she has thought about something other than herself during dinner for a long time you guys!! Steven tells them they better not flop, as his ultra cool high school friends will be there, and he doesn't want to be embarrassed. Poor Steven, it must be hard having younger twin sisters who are part of a best selling young adults series :-p! Jessica gets angry and declares they will be the best in the show; after all, they aren't fakers! Elizabeth starts to feel really uncomfortable and tells Jess she can't go through with it, but gets rollered over by Jessica as usual and gives in.

All night long the twins practice because going to school and doing a performance where they they have to concentrate on not giving the game away on a few hours sleep is a really good idea and eventually get the code down pat. Liz is 'relieved', and they go to bed.

All day at school the twins' are nervous. Everyone is wishing them good luck for the talent show that night, apart from Ellen of course. Liz tells Jess she has to drop her mom's cheque off after school, but will be back at the school for half past 6 at the latest.

That evening, Liz goes over to the hotel. She thinks it's 'creepy' because everything is covered over in dustsheets and the place is deserted. A lone builder lets her in, but, in this series he does not try to rape her/steal her face/kill her/assume her identity or anything else. He tells her Mr Peters office is on the fourth floor, and points out the elevator. He then leaves for the weekend. Liz goes up, after waiting absolutely ages for the elevator. She is getting a bit anxious about the time. She delivers the cheque to Mr Peters no problem, and he offers to escort her down in the elevator (oh-er) after he has changed the message on his answering machine. She declines, and goes out to wait for the elevator. Because it takes so long, she decides to use the stairs after all. She runs all the way down, and when she gets to the bottom, the door is locked. Oh Noes!! She quickly runs up again, and Mr Peters has obviously by now left the building and locked the door as he left. She panics and tries all the doors of the levels down. All are locked. Oh Noes....

Leaving our intrepid explorer locked in a stairwell for the time being, let's see what Jessica is up to. She is at the school waiting for Liz. Time is ticking, and she's getting a bit worried. What if Liz has had a moral fit and isn't going to turn up. One of the acts has dropped out, so the 'Psychic Sisters' act has been brought forward. Besides, they are the stars of the show and everyone wants to see them. Mr Mason, Randy's uncle, comes backstage to meet the twins. Jess fobs off Elizabeth's absence, but wonders what is keeping her sister. Poor Jess I do feel for her at this minute. Mr Mason is quite scary and keeps rambling on about phony psychics, and how they should be locked up! However, eventually he goes to take his place in the audience, and Jess catches sight of Ellen practicing. As Ellen sees Jessica, she glares at her. Then...her voice cracks and goes altogether. Ellen blames Jessica; she says she put a curse on her. Haha! I hate Ellen, so go Jessica!! Jess protests, but Ellen isn't having any of it and goes off. Now her act is out as well, Jess really is in trouble. She can hear the crowd chanting for the 'Psychic Sisters'. Jessica suggests to Mandy and Belinda they invite Ellen to lip synch with them, and feels like she has done her friendly duty. As they rush off to the stage (with no rehearsal as a trio or anything - not that that matters as it is Sweet Valley and everyone is great), she whispers, "remember me well". It would be touching if it wasn't so funny.

Back to Elizabeth for a moment. She is still stuck in the stairwell, despite crying and shouting for help. She keeps imagining her lifeless body being found on Monday. No offence Liz but I don't think you'd be dead. And if you were, why would they go looking in a stairwell? Liz cries as she thinks about how embarrassed Jessica is going to be at the talent show, and how she will hate Elizabeth for backing out, even though she hasn't. She tries to send a psychic message to her twin, "Please find me Jessica, I'm stuck in the stairwell of the Regent Hotel".

Back at school, Jessica has no choice but to go on alone and apologise. She is thinking, "I'll never forgive you for this, Liz. This should be the best night of my life", (which is usual Jessica talk) as she slowly enters the stage, but as she gets centrestage she realises in a flash that Liz would never desert her (took you long enough, Jess). Liz must somehow be in trouble at the hotel. No, really? Quick on the uptake, this one! She gets centrestage, and apologises for Elizabeth's absence. She says that she has had a psychic message from her sister, and then pretends to be receiving another message from Elizabeth. She spreads her arms (not legs, for a change) and starts rocking. She cries, "heeeeeellllp me, heeeelp me, I'm stuck at the Regent Hotel". She then pretends to be alert and says, "Elizabeth, is that you", whilst keeping an eye on the camera to make sure Mr Mason is filming her. Haha, that's our Jess! The next thing she knows, Ned is by the stage. He looks angry and worried. Jessica tells him she is pretty sure Liz is stuck at the Regent Hotel, and he picks her up and carries her off stage. Mr Mason follows them, as this is obviously more exciting than the talent show!

In the car on the way to the hotel, Mr Mason interviews Jessica. They call the police at some point too. When they get there, they wait outside as nobody has a key. Mr Mason films Jessica, even though she isn't happy with how she sounds and asks to do it again. Thats Jessica, always concentrating on what's important, like finding her one and only twin sister. Mr Peters eventually turns up with the key, and they go in. They call for Elizabeth, and she starts shouting she's stuck in the stairwell. As soon as it's opened, Jessica rushes in to hug her, accompanied with Elizabeth's tearful, "I'm so glad you found me. I sent you a psychic message." Jessica then turns to the camera with a big grin, taps her temple and says, "see, psychic"

Everyone goes to Lila's afterwards for a party (what book would be complete without the obligatory party) to celebrate the talent show. I'm surprised the Wakefield parents let them but I keep forgetting this is Sweet Valley. Ellen is all happy because she got to go onstage in the end. Mr Mason has donated his film to the local news channel, and they watch it. That's a very quick news channel; the film must be considered breaking news, lol. It shows Jessica's performance at the talent show (to which Liz says, "how corny" - she isn't shook up by her experience at all, you see) and the film closes with the close up of Jessica tapping her temple and saying, "see, psychic". The newscaster announces at the end, "Whether this was an example of psychic messages or just sisterly love, this is a great story of trust and eleventh hour rescue."
Bless. I have a solitary tear!

On Monday, it is announced that the twins' didn't win the talent show. What, I thought they ALWAYS won; don't tell me that ghostwriters were trying to be fair or anything. I'm just back onto my chair after falling off in shock. Jessica is disappointed, but Randy tells her his uncle has a friend who would be interested in interviewing them for a magazine. Jessica is so dying to say yes, but she catches Elizabeth's eye and says no - after all they are fakes! they are retiring their psychic skills to concentrate on other things. Woo, Jess did the right thing for a change; my bottom is in danger of being covered in bruises at this rate from keeping falling off the chair!

It's a shame Liz got locked up really as I wanted to see how the fake performance would go!!! What do you guys think would have happened?

The foreshadowing for the next book is all the kids being excited about the Middle School football team's chances - leading onto #71. Jessica Saves the Trees.